Maui Happy Hours

If you’re a working stiff like me and not a fortunate Canadian who happened to buy their condo for cash when they were riding high on the dollar exchange a few years ago, you appreciate so much as a single dollar off when you want to go out for a drink. The following are the current happy hours for most of Maui’s popular spots here at the beginning of 2016. Happy hours for restaurants not listed probably don’t have happy hours or do not want to advertise it. Suffice it to say, these places don’t get my business (except for Roy’s in Ka’anapali, which is super Ono). Note: In case you’re not familiar with how Happy Hour works, Happy Hours are almost exclusively conducted at the business’ bar (usually, but not always).

*Please email me with any corrections or omissions at vinjo.rubro@gmail.com.

West Maui (Kapalua, Napili, Ka’anapali, Lahaina)

Bubba Gump (on Front Street in Lahaina) 9-10:30pm Allegedly.

Cane and Canoe (at Montage on Kapalua Bay) 8-11pm

Captain Jacks (on Front Street in Lahaina) 2-5pm

Cheeseburger in Paradise (on Front Street in Lahaina) HH always changing due to poor management.

Cool Cat Café (on Front Street in Lahaina) 3-6pm)

Cliff Dive Bar (At the Sheraton in Ka’anapali) 2-3pm and 8-9pm

Honu Seafood and Pizza (at Lahaina Cannery Mall) 3-4:30pm

Hula Grill (overlooking Ka’anapali Beach) 3-5pm

Japango (at the Hyatt Regency in Ka’anapali) 5-6:30pm

Fleetwood’s on Front Street (on Front Street in Lahaina) 3-6pm But will still cost your entire paycheck.

Ka’anapali Grille and Tap Room (south end of Ka’anapali Beach) 3-5pm

Kimo’s (on Front Street in Lahaina) 3-5pm

Leilani’s on the Beach (Ka’anapali) 3-5pm

Longi’s (on Front Street in Lahaina) 3-6pm

Lulu’s (at Lahaina Cannery Mall) 4-7pm

Maui Tiki Bar (at the Sheraton in Ka’anapali) 10am-12pm Yes, you read that right.

Merriman’s (on Kapalua Bay) 3-5pm

Pailolo Bar & Grill (at the Westin in Ka’anapali) 4-6pm

Paradise Grill (Ka’anapali) 3-6pm

Ruth Chris Steak House (in Lahaina off of Front Street) 5-7pm

Sea House Restaurant (Napili) 2-5pm

Son’z Steakhouse (Hyatt Regency in Ka’anapali / Lahaina) 5-7pm

Sugar Cane Restaurant (Lahaina) 2:30-5:30pm

Paia and Makawao

Café des Ami (in Paia on Baldwin Ave) 4-6pm

Café Mambo (in Paia on Baldwin Ave) 3-6pm

Cassanova’s (Makawao) 5-6pm But not on Sundays.

Charlie’s (in Paia on Hana Hwy) 3-6pm

Milagros (in Paia on the corner of Hana Hwy and Baldwin Ave) 11am-6pm Only at the small bar inside.

Rock and Brews (in Paia on Hana Hwy) 3-6pm

Stopwatch Bar and Grill (Makawao) 3:30-6:30pm

South Maui (Kihei, Wailea, Makena)

Ambrosia (in “the Triangle” in Kihei) 7-9pm

Ami Ami (Kihei) 3-6pm

Botero (at the Grand Wailea in Wailea) 5-6pm

Café O’Lei (Kihei) 3:30-5:30pm

Cow Pig Bun (Kihei Tech Park) 4-6pm

Dog and Duck (in “the Triangle” in Kihei) 3-7pm

Fabiani’s (Kihei and Wailea) 3-5pm

Fat Daddy’s Bar and Grill (in “the Triangle” in Kihei)

Five Palms (Kihei) 3-7pm and 9-11pm

Gannons (Makena) 3-8pm

Kono’s on the Green (Kihei Tech Park) 2:30-6pm

Life’s A Beach (in “the Triangle” in Kihei) 3-7pm

Manolis (Wailea) 3-6pm and 9-12am

Maui Brewing Company (Kihei Tech Park) $2 off on Wednesdays if you wear one of their T-shirts.

Maui Thai Bistro (Kihei) 4-6pm and 8:30-9:30pm

Migrant (at the Marriot in Wailea) 4-6pm

Molokini Grill (at Makena Beach and Golf Resort in Makena) 5:30-6:30pm

Monkeypod Kitchen (Wailea) 3-5:30pm and 9-11pm

Moose McGillycuddy’s (Kihei) 4-7pm

Mulligans on the Blue (Wailea/Makena) 2-6pm and 9-12am

Nalu’s (Kihei) ?

Nick’s Fish Market (at the Fairmont in Wailea)

Roasted Chilis (Kihei) 3-5pm

Sarentos on the Beach (Kihei) 4:30-6:30pm

South Shore Tiki Lounge (in “the Triangle” in Kihei) 11-6pm Yes, you read that right.

What Ales You (in “the Triangle” in Kihei) 12-3pm

Maui Brewing Company, Kihei

[This review is for the recently opened Maui Brewing location on the mauka side of Lipoa Parkway.]

The first thing that will strike you as you drive up Lipoa Parkway to Maui Brewing Company is how massive the building is. Seriously, it looks like an airplane hanger from the outside. That’s because this location is their new state-of-the-art eco-minded brewing location from which they plan worldwide domination. That, and they plan on opening a HUGE restaurant that will surely be to the chagrin of nearby Kono’s on the Green. Until now, I didn’t know buildings this big existed on Maui.

At any rate, the tasting room is really all that is open now, with the owner giving free tours of the brewery when he’s feeling whimsical. (That is, don’t come here expecting to get a tour.) The tasting room features all their brews neatly written on a blackboard over the bar, served

by an emotionally inconsistent staff (more on that shortly). Now, I’m a dark beer man myself and I have to say if you like dark beer, go beyond the already fantastic coconut porter for the Imperial coconut porter. Holy cow, you can chew this stuff it’s so thick! So you grab your drinks and you can grab one of the few seats indoors or you can head out the open bay doors and grab a table for a more communal feel. The view from this patio isn’t all that great; you’d think it be better this far up the road, but, not so much. If you want some grinds though the restaurant isn’t open yet, food carts on the road are currently servicing Maui Brewing’s food needs. So, all’s good. Well, almost.

A few things bothered me here. The female bartenders were unfriendly, the direct opposite of the male bartenders. I don’t know if the ladies are all cycling at the same time or what, but I found this off-putting. Second, Maui Brewing is selling a HydroFlask™ beer growler which clearly does not work. A friend of mine bought one, went through the wringer to get the leaky one he got replaced, and now the replacement doesn’t work either. Beware of the HydroFlask™ beer growler; it doesn’t work, period. Worse, Maui Brewing knows it and is still trying to offload them. That’s not cool in my book. It also doesn’t make sense that I can get almost a full six-pack in the supermarket for the price of one beer in the tasting room when the beer is might on location. Weird.

Still, I love their beers and I’m sure this will be an interesting location once the restaurant opens and the business park this location is part of grows. I’ll probably be back, but only for business lunches I can write off on my taxes.

Open 11 am to 10pm

605 Lipoa Pkwy, Kihei, HI 96753

808.213.3002

Chutes and Ladders, Maui

Nice.

I’m going to begin with what I am not going to tell you. I am not going to tell you where Chutes and Ladders is. I certainly could tell you and would have liked someone to have posted the location so that my crew didn’t spend literally half a day looking for it, but there are reasons why no one is giving up this location easily (don't even bother asking a local in the area). The first reason is that Chutes and Ladders is on private land, though anyone determined to find this place isn't going to care about that since the land is supposedly owned by the Maui Pineapple Company; at least that’s what I remember the “No Trespassing” signs saying. Those “No Trespassing” signs may be there to protect the land owner for the second reason no one says where this little adventure is, that being the high risk of injury. I will say that the ‘trail head’ is about .4 miles past mile marker 37 (long before mile marker 38) on the eastern side of Honokohau Bay. If and when you find the trail, proceed at your own risk, following the trail towards the water and then to the left where the trail turns into grass. That’s where you will find the ropes.

Arial view of the location.

When you find the ropes, you’re going to say one of two things, either “It doesn’t look that bad” or “I’m not doing that.” The cliff face you need to climb down is about 40 feet high; certainly not 60 feet high as other blog posters have written. The incline is about an 80 percent slope, meaning that unless you rock climb regularly, you’re going to need the ropes to get safely down to the bottom. There are plenty of toe holds and crevices to get your fingers on, though having long legs is certainly to someone’s advantage here. If you arrive and find the rocks wet from a recent passing rain cloud, I would advise against attempting this descent. In fact, if you do not do this kind of thing regularly or if you do not consider yourself fit or if you mind getting a little scraped up, I would not attempt to climb down. I was quite nervous going down, probably due to an old repelling accident when I was in the Army years ago. Has anyone died here? Yes, at least one person has died here, though probably more. The media in Hawaii tends to gloss over or ignore these kinds of things for fear of hurting tourism. On the other hand, if you’re young and somehow have it in your head that you are immortal, then by all means, proceed without caution. (There is, by the way, another eight foot wall of lava rock to scoot down right next to the pool. Though it’s a 90 percent slope, it’s not that big a deal after the rope climb.)

The rope climb down. The pool is hidden to the right.

The pool itself is quite inviting, though no more interesting than the more well-known Olivine Pools a few more miles to the east. That is to say, no one comes here for the pool itself, rather they come because there is a potential for death and danger. At about five feet deep, the pool is deep enough to cannonball into from a modest height and there are fish in the pool but thankfully, no sea urchins, at least not that I saw. I would recommend bringing reef shoes / tabis since walking around on the volcanic rock is a bit much on tender feet, plus the algae in the pool makes climbing out with bare feet slippery. As a general precaution, if the ocean is pounding the shore and waves are splashing over the rocks into the pool, don’t go in the pool. One rouge wave is all it takes to wash a person out to sea.

Blackbeard the Goat.

When my crew was done, the climb back out was infinitely easier, at least for me. The black goat awaiting us at the top didn’t seem too pleased with us, though. Either we were on his land or he was angry we weren’t going to feed him. We were hungry, too, and needed to get ourselves over to the Maui Brewing Company so we beat a hasty retreat to avoid getting head-butted by this guy. Remember, when you’re done, please pack everything you brought in back out, unless you brought rope. You can never have enough rope if you ask me. Future ‘adventurers’ will thank you.

Video taken with my beat up Cannon Powershot.